Pauline

My name is Pauline I am 23. Dad dies when I am seven years old. I move to stay with my aunt. I am unable to join high school because of lack of school fees and so I remain at home to support my aunt with housework. One day she sends me to my step brother’s house. I find him with his children his wife is not at home. We prepare dinner and after dinner I am told to sleep on the sofa.

At midnight I find myself naked in this man’s bed. He tells me not to tell anyone or else he will kill me. I know nobody will believe me. I don’t even know whom to tell. I keep quiet but feel pain inside because of this ordeal. I blame myself for having slept too soundly. At 19 with no proper education and no job I feel it is better to get married. I meet this gentleman who promises to marry me.  I know he is cheating on me. I am quiet though because I don’t want to go back to the tough life at home. My fiancée is suffering from a very painful sexually transmitted infection and is blaming it on me. We get treatment but after he asks me to leave his life. I go back home and keep falling sick and the doctor advises that I know my status. I test HIV positive. I know one day I will be able to learn a skill and earn a livelihood so that people don’t look down upon me. I also know that I will find someone who will truly love me.
I dream of having a family a happy one and God willing I will.
I just don’t know where to start from.